This tale really starts Friday night during my Xbox live marathon. After staying up late doing that I woke up earlyish and drove to Kathryn’s place in Memphis. I arrived a little tired and ready for a nap but we had to do some Christmas shopping for me first. Hey, it’s shopping for me so I can’t complain. On our way to the mall we stopped at a New Orleans themed restaurant for lunch. Let me break to say that usually, when we’re in Memphis she pays for everything and when we’re in Batesville I pay for everything, which is probably not exactly fair as there are only a handful of restaurants to eat at in Batesville and most of them are in the cheap-as-hell section of Zagats. So anyway, Kathryn plops down her credit card at the end of the meal and pays for lunch, then we cruise over to the mall to buy a pair of pants.

After eating I’m even more tired and the mall is absolutely packed. Shoulder to shoulder is no exaggeration. We pick out some pants and I try them on… to small. I have to try the size up. These fit fine except they need to be hemmed. Then I have to wait for the lady to find her pins. She stands me up on the little box by the mirrors under what has to be the hottest lamp I have ever encountered. As I stand there waiting for the lady to pin my pants, I am literally wiping sweat off my brow. I’m getting seriously tired at this point and anyone who knows me very well knows that I get cranky when I’m tired. Somehow I manage to stay cool through another pinning session on my second pair of pants and we head to the cashier. All we had to do was pay and I could get my nap. But at this point Kathryn realizes she left her credit card at the restaurant. We fight through the mall back outside, fight through holiday shopping traffic and get back to the restaurant to find that the manager has the credit card. Good deal, except the manager is out running errands. I’m tired, I’m seriously cranky and I just want my damn nap. The people at the restaurant are apologetic and nice. They even appease us with free beer. I order a Corona and it comes in an ice-cold, frosty mug. It’s the most delicious beer I’ve ever tasted. Suddenly, I’m not so cranky. The manager comes back after a few minutes and hands Kathryn her credit card. I down the rest of my beer, then I down the rest of Kathryn’s beer. We go back to her place and then, basking in the warm feeling that comes with receiving free beer, I finally get my nap.