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October 31, 2004

He was honestly too drunk

He was honestly too drunk to operate the door

What great night of drunken debochery. When it comes doewn to it. Isn't that the best kind of debochery there is? Spelling editing to happen later, when sober. Bitach.

October 28, 2004

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October 27, 2004

If I were alive, would

If I were alive, would you go to the Halloween dance with me?

If people are still coming down Saturday, I'm thinking there will be boozin', schmoozin' and may some rotation foosin'. And bobbing for beer, because that's just good clean fun. But please let me know, because if no one can make it, I'll make other plans.

October 26, 2004

What kinda' scary-ass clowns came

What kinda' scary-ass clowns came to your birthday?

Happy birthday Bryan!

October 24, 2004

I only use my sick

I only use my sick days for hangovers and soap opera weddings.

I hate being sick. My ears and throat are driving me crazy. I can hardly hear out of my left ear and I can't swallow without pain in the back of my throat. Not to mention that overall queasy feeling. I hate being sick. Make me laugh.

October 22, 2004

That was once, alright, for

That was once, alright, for a Halloween party. And I'd appreciate it if you would take the picture off of your screensaver.

Anyone down for a trip to The Zoo far a little Halloween drunkfest the Saturday right before Halloween proper? Remember, my front yard used to be a graveyard.

October 21, 2004

Vote Or Die! Vote Now,

Vote Or Die!

Vote Now, Vote Often Vote Robocratic!

The trouble with computers, of

The trouble with computers, of course, is that they're very sophisticated idiots.

I think I need to scale back my time on the internet and here's why; I have three email accounts, one I check honestly over 20 times a day, one I check around 5 times a day, and one I check once a day. I have three accounts on AOL Instant Messenger, one on MSN Messenger, one on Yahoo Messenger, and one each in the ICQ and IRC clients. I have two WebPages, one that I'm constantly tinkering with, the other one I check a few times a week to make sure nothing strange has happened. I also have around 10 regular sites that I visit daily. About half of which I check every couple of hours, if I'm around a computer. Combine all that with the fact my job is essentially teaching people how to build WebPages, and you end up with more time on the net that anyone should spend. That’s just the Internet, it doesn’t count all the time I spend on my compy playing games, photoshoping, flashing, playing with acid pro, or the hours I spend writing. I need to go all Walden on this thing.

October 18, 2004

I spent a year there

I spent a year there one weekend.

What a great weekend. I spent most of Friday night at my favorite Irish pub with Bourke, shooting the breeze and just catching up. But the real highlight of the night, next to Casey shelling out 50 bucks on one round of drinks, was listening to the man at the urinal make fun of the man puking in stall. After that, there was spending time with my grandparents, visiting my uncle, eating massive quantities of Chinese food, hanging out at Casey's, and going to see Team America. I even found fun in driving my Grandpa to dialysis. All of it done hangover free. Which is always a bonus. Not like that other time, when Bob told that girl I wasn't really a pilot, then I got up early and drove people someplace with a hangover and then had to go get them and bring them home right away, then go to a reletive's for a nice greasy breakfast. I don't think that time was even a weekend but it sure was hangoverific. What's your best/worst hangover story?

October 16, 2004

I saw two of my

I saw two of my ex-girlfriends on Oprah. One had become a man. The other was dating him.

Most of the time I don't mind being single. I don't mind spending my Friday nights with friends instead of going out with a girlfriend. But there's something about the Fall that makes me wish I had somebody special to spend my time with. To me, there's nothing sexier than a girl in jeans and a sweatshirt and Fall is perfect jeans and sweatshirt weather. Sitting on the couch, with a girl dressed like that, watching movies on a cold and rainy fall evening, so much fun. Curse my awkward shyness. Gotta get over that.

October 14, 2004

I'm going for the high

I'm going for the high score.

I know it's several months past due but I finally updated the leader board. I guess it's time for another chance to score too. Last time it was cartoons this time it's going to be your most ass-kicking-est and addictive online game. Addresses in the comments, we'll start voting next Fridayish.

October 13, 2004

If men had to have

If men had to have babies, they would only have one

Congratulations to Kelly and her new baby boy born yesterday(Tuesday). Hunter Douglas was born 7 lbs 12 oz and 23 inches long.

October 12, 2004

Depression... It's a mother fucker

Depression... It's a mother fucker

The sick thing about being depressed is that I know there's no reason to feel this way. I know what tips me over shouldn't tip me over but it does. I know there are things I can do to make myself feel a little better but I can't or won't do them. The fucked up thing about being depressed is that I can't watch certain movies, listen to certain music, think about certain things, or spend too much time alone. I don't have time to go to the doc and get myself fixed up. I've got a nice chunk of money in the mail somewhere, hopefully when that gets here I can afford to take a day off work and visit the doc. On the other hand, it’s good I’m broke right now or I would probably go on a senseless spending spree. I'm not going to sleep tonight and I have a mid-term tomorrow. In the words of Christopher Walken, "A man can be an artist in anything. In food, whatever… It depends on how good he is at it." Can a man be an artist at being depressed? In the words of my best friend, "This sucks the balls".

October 11, 2004

This film DARES you to

This film DARES you to watch it.

From what I've seen so far, this is going to be a great movie. I hope it comes out on a week that I'm doing a review. Speaking of reviews, does anyone want to see Team America: World Police or Shall We Dance? this coming weekend? I'm telling you right now, that I would really hate having to go alone to a movie like Shall We Dance.

October 10, 2004

From delusion lead me to

From delusion lead me to Truth From darkness lead me to Light From death lead me to eternal life.

My mom called me this morning and told me that Betsy Lowe was murdered last night. Though I was never very close to her, it does startle me to know that somebody I went to school with was murdered. And yet, now I cannot even remember exactly how to spell her last name. Later today, I will say a prayer for her family and eventually move on, hoping that when I die people will know how to spell my name.

October 07, 2004

The internet fell on my

The internet fell on my head

So I did some work to the ol' page today. You may notice a few additions to the Stuff Bar, most notably, the ability to play music. It's only one song right now, but I'll probably add more to it later.

October 06, 2004

I refuse to be a

I refuse to be a man. I insist on being a dog

Does anyone want or know of someone who would want a lab mix, approx 10 years old, excellent health, great with other dogs and cats and people. Let me know ASAP if you do, otherwise I guess it's going to the pound.

October 05, 2004

This is the best elevator

This is the best elevator music I've ever heard!

Okay here it is.
John Kicks Ass (Theme From Johnny Rockstar Dot Net)
Artist: Toast
Album: Songs In The Key Of Johnny
Lyrics: Ryan and Casey
Arrangement: Ryan.
Lead Guitar and Vocals: Casey
Backup Guitar and Vocals: Ryan
Voice Over: Johnny Rockstar
Producer: Johnny
Man Who Ruined The Most Takes Because He Was Buzzing To Come In Or Laughing Out Loud But Did Do A Fine Job Acting As The Acoustic Barrier: Jake

Don't forget you can right-click and save as.

October 03, 2004

Arrrrrrrr! Can whoever ended up

Arrrrrrrr!

Can whoever ended up with the lyrics to the Pirate John song please put the words up here. I know we haven't laid down any phat beats to go with it yet, but I sure would love to see them up here. That patchiest line gets me every time. And for those of you that I know to be waiting for it, "John Kicks Ass" should be up tomorrow afternoon.

October 01, 2004

Kitchen, bedroom, I knew it

Kitchen, bedroom, I knew it was a room I was good in!

Though I do feel I should be a least somewhat cryptic about this, I want the world to know that last night I said no to the knock on my bedroom door not once, not twice, but three times. Not that there was realy anything wrong with her, she just wasn't my type and the one night stand thing just isn't my style. Instead I laid on my bed and fell asleep listening to Merle Haggard. Because, I don't care what the rest of you think, I like Merle Haggard, dammit.